we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I fill condoms, not promises.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
