You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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