But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
