and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
