problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
