I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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