ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
