Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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