just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
