Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
And then he peed in my hair
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