Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize