So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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