puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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