so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
