STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
