You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
