I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize