Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Randomize
