i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
