dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize