Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
