i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize