He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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