We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize