okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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