You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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