Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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