just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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