I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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