I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
he thought i was a dude.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
