This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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