he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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