The beer is more important than you right now.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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