i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
