Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Did I show you my penis last night?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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