I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
