At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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