Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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