im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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