ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
