Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'm always down for nudity.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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