He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
