He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
