Where are you?
In a non slutty way
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize