...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
