i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
