I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
