I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
