tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
