Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
